社交活动的真相

    此文是与《Entrepreneur》的合作文章。下文最初发表于Entrepreneur.com。

    对于社交活动的价值，存在很多普遍的认识误区和不同观点。有些人很喜欢社交活动，但大多数人却很讨厌。有些人认为，参加这些活动是拓展人脉、结交新朋友的唯一方式，其他人则倾向于选择别的途径。这完全取决于个人的需求和性格。

    对于考虑参加社交活动的人，以下是如何开始的一些建议，以及其他能让你遇到贵人的方式。

    初始阶段你应当去参加社交活动。

    特别是当你新进入一个行业时，你需要建立人脉网络。

    我开始涉足初创行业时，几乎不认识任何业内人士，甚至都找不到认识业内人士的人。我不能仅靠我的朋友或家人把我介绍给初创企业。我无法通过引见接触到业内人士,但社交活动却可以让我接触到。

    社交活动让你有机会在很短的时间内结识很多人。在你建立起一个小型关系网后，你可以在这个小型关系网中获得推荐，这或许是认识更多新朋友的最好方式。

    社交活动是非常好的锻炼。

    除了提供一些初期的人脉关系外，这些活动也为初入社交圈的人提供了提高社交技巧的好机会。你可以读读《人性的弱点》（How to Win Friends and Influence People）这类书，但要提高与人交往的能力，最好的办法还是与很多人交往。

    通过足够的练习，你将适应先前感觉不适的场合，因为你获得了“记忆体验”。一旦你提高了交往技能，你将更有能力与你想见到的高价值个人见面沟通，而且一旦遇到，你也能更有效地进行沟通并建立起关系。

    遇到一个不错的人，就是一个好结果。

    人们总是抱怨，参加活动有时候是浪费时间，因为结识不到很棒的人。不错，大多数活动都充斥着很多你并不想结识的人，很可能你遇到的都是活动结束之后你不愿再进一步联系的人。我认为，如果你能参加三、五场活动就遇到一个不错的人，就已经是很不错的投资回报了。如能建立一段良好的关系，那么其他活动总共浪费的时间也是值得的。与其结识50个你将来永远都不会再交谈的人，不如努力结识一个将维系一生持久关系的人。

    社交并非都那么糟糕——如果你选择明智的话。

    一提起社交活动，大多数人想到的是销售员和求职者互换名片并推销自己。确实：完全以商业社交为目的、不围绕特定人群或行业的活动，常常很乏味，且效果不佳。

    因此，不要参加那些不适合你的活动，选择那些你有兴趣和激情的活动。甚至一些工作之外的活动，比如体育活动或读书会，也可以成为拓展人脉的好机会。你永远不会知道什么人会出现，而且由于你们有共同的兴趣，建立关系的过程将流畅很多。我最初开始拓展人脉时遇到贵人的那些“社交活动”实际上并不是社交活动，而是是课堂、讲座和座谈。

    社交活动并非唯一出路。

    有时候人们也会批评社交活动，他们说通常碰不到什么值得见的人。这些指责并非完全没有依据。不错，社交场合的很多人都不是你想结识的。

    有一些更好的结识人的方式，比如通过现有人脉网络引见、写博客和发送陌生邮件等。多说一句，社交活动通常都很乏味。（财富中文网）

    译者：早稻米

    This post is in partnership with Entrepreneur. The article below was originally published at Entrepreneur.com.

    There are a lot of common misconceptions and varying opinions about the value of networking events. Some people love them while most people hate then. Some people think going to events is the only way to network and meet new people while others prefer other channels. It all depends on your needs and personality.

    For those thinking of attending networking events, here is some advice on getting started, along with other ways you can meet great people.

    You should go when first starting out.

    Particularly if you are entering a new industry, you will need to build up a base of relationships.

    When I wanted to get into startups, I hardly knew anyone in the industry — or even anyone who know anyone in the industry. I couldn’t just ask my friends or family to introduce me to startups. Events allowed me to me to meet people in the industry that I couldn’t have reached through referrals.

    Networking events provide you with the opportunity to meet lots of people in a short amount of time. After you build a small base network, you can start getting referrals from them, which is probably the best way to meet new people.

    Networking events are great practice.

    In addition to providing some initial relationships, these events provide beginning networkers with an outstanding opportunity to improve networking skills. While you can read books like How to Win Friends and Influence People, the best way to get better at meeting people is to meet lots of people.

    With enough practice, situations that previously felt uncomfortable will become comfortable as you gain “remembered experiences.” Once you’ve improved your skills, you will be more capable of meeting the high value people you want to meet, and you will be more effective at communicating and relationship building once you do.

    Meeting just one good person is a good outcome.

    People often complain that going to events is not an effective use of time because you don’t meet enough good people. It is true that most events will be attended be a lot of people that you don’t actually want to meet, and that it’s likely you will not meet anyone that you want to stay in touch with after you leave. I believe that if you meet just one good person for every three to five events you go to, that is actually a really great return on investment. The value of one great relationship can vastly exceed the wasted time of the other events combined. Instead of trying to meet 50 people that you never talk to again, try to meet just one person that will become a lifelong relationship.

    They’re not all bad — if you choose wisely.

    When most people think networking events, they think of salespeople and job seekers exchanging business cards and selling themselves. It’s generally true: Events created solely for the purpose of business networking, with no focus on a particular type of person or industry, tend to be dry and less productive.

    So instead of attending events that aren’t for you, go to events around your interests and passions. Even events outside of work — such as intramural sports or book clubs — can be great networking opportunities. You never know who else could be there, and because you have shared interests, the relationship-building process will be a lot more fluid. The “networking events” where I met the best people when I first started networking were not actually networking events. They were classes, lectures and workshops.

    Networking is not the end all be all.

    Networking events sometimes get a bad rap by people who say you usually don’t meet anyone worth meeting. Those accusations are not completely unfounded. It’s true, networking events are usually attended by lots of people you don’t want to meet.

    There are better ways to meet good people, such as getting introductions through your existing network, blogging, and cold emailing. In addition, networking events are often boring.