职场4大致命“黑洞”

    不懂感恩

    别人为你提供帮助的时候，向对方的努力表示感谢非常重要。当然，你可以当时就向对方表达谢意，也可以把对方的好意记在心里，指导自己未来的行为。例如，你请求别人帮忙进行社交推介，一定要让联系人知道最后的结果如何。不论你做什么，千万不能请求他人为你牵线搭桥，却在安排初次会面的时候犯错误。

    帕姆•索西在担任蒙哥马利郡教育委员会（Literacy Council of Montgomery County）常务主任时，一位下属的朋友游说她启动一个新项目。项目将由那位下属的朋友负责。索西回忆说：“我必须新增加一个岗位，还得想办法解决这个岗位的工资问题。她确实在非常卖力地推介，搞得我不得不申请许可，还在原本就已经很狭窄的办公室里给她腾出了一块地方。”

    然而，两个月不到，那位员工就放弃了这份“梦幻工作”。其实，早在几个月之前，这个项目当时还在筹备，而索西也还没有同意为她专门设立一个岗位的时候，她就已经有了这样的打算。这就是忘恩负义。

    要寻找各种方式对同事的努力表示感谢，哪怕是通过一些间接的方法。高管教练米歇尔•弗里德曼就曾帮助一位客户，将360度绩效评估中的负面同级反馈变成个人成长和加深职场人际关系的一次机会。

    弗里德曼回忆称：“她把同事的反馈看成一次机会，用来对同事说：‘感谢你花时间填写调查表，提出意见。我认真考虑过你说的话，希望能与你交流一下如何让我们的合作更加融洽。’” 

    Forgetting to say thank you

    When someone does you a favor, it's important to acknowledge the effort. Of course, you should thank the person at the moment, but also keep the favor in mind as a guide for your future behavior. For instance, if you ask for a networking introduction, be sure to let your contact know how it turns out. Whatever you do, don't ask for an introduction and then drop the ball in setting up an initial meeting.

    When Pam Saussy was executive director of the Literacy Council of Montgomery County, a friend of one of her employees lobbied for Saussy to launch a new program that the friend would run. "I had to create a position and figure out how to carve out some pay for it," Saussy recalls. "She really sold it hard, and I had to get permission and find a place for her in a tight office."

    Barely two months later, the employee quit to take her "dream job" at the State Department, a move that had been in the works for months -- long before Saussy agreed to create a position for her. Talk about ingratitude.

    Look for ways to appreciate your colleagues' efforts, even when it might not be obvious. Executive coach Michelle Friedman helped a client turn negative peer feedback from a 360-degree review into a chance for personal growth and deeper workplace relationships.

    "She used it as an opportunity to go back to them and say, 'Thank you for investing the time in filling out the survey and writing comments. I've thought about what you said, and I'd love to talk about ways we can work together better,' " recalls Friedman.