昂山素季：失败成就最出色的领导者

    MPW内部网络是一个邀请最有影响力的商界女性及时解答职业与领导力问题的在线社区。本周，我们的问题是：成功女性如何应对拒绝？以下是Vital Voices Global Partnership公司CEO兼联合创始人阿里斯•尼尔森的回答。

    我认识的每一位领导者都遭遇过挫折。成功的领导者往往因挫折而变得更加强大，而不是一蹶不振。事实上，阻碍我们前进的并非拒绝或失败，而是我们应对它们的方式。归根结底，面对困难我们选择做什么，将决定我们能否挖掘自身潜力以收获成功。数年前，我听过阿里安娜•郝芬顿这样说：“失败并非成功的对立面；失败是成功的垫脚石。”我对此深信不疑。

    18年来，我接触过许多优秀的女性领导者，她们总是能够实现自己的目标，因为她们拒绝放弃。最重要的并不是失败，而是我们在失败之后如何振作起来，如何从失败中总结经验教训。面对失败时，每个人都应该做两件事：从失败中学习，继续前进。真正的领导者拥有坚定的意志，时时刻刻都在追逐自己的事业目标。她们的力量源于自我意识。我们必须对自己的优点与缺点保持谦逊，然后选择向着明确的目标前进。

    我相信大多数人并非天生领导者，她们之所以能够成功，源自她们的经验与机遇。失败是其中的关键部分。失败坚定了我们的决心，帮助我们树立笃信不移的信念。如果你不清楚自己为什么要成为领导者，你就不可能当好领导者——因为你没有明确的、不可动摇的目标。有时候，我们只有在经受过考验之后才会意识到这个目标。当我们遭遇失败的时候，我们才会找到未来的方向，才会懂得我们如何抵达最终的目的地，以及我们最初为什么开始。

    根据我自己的经验，失败让我对自己的领导力、驱动力和我自己产生了非常有价值的见解。个人发展是一个艰难且来之不易的过程，但最终的结果值得你为之付出。四年前，我有幸在仰光见到了缅甸民盟领导人昂山素季。她当时刚刚从20年的非法软禁中被释放出来。那次会面让我终生难忘，我知道，那短短的几个小时将成为我一生中最离奇、最有启发的一次经历。

    在领导民主运动的过程中，如果为了追求民主理想需要以自己的声音、自由或安全为代价，昂山素季从来都不会犹豫。她承担着巨大的风险，要忍受迫害和无数次失败。但在她看来，与保护公平、民主与正义这些价值相比，这些失败根本不值一提。她的目光超越了失败的风险，因为她一心一意地专注于缅甸的未来，不会让任何事妨碍她实现自己的目标，或动摇她的信念。

    我曾将她对我说过的话分享给许多与我共事的女同胞。她说：“不论前行的道路多么艰难，良好的心愿与优秀的领导力之间的区别就在于坚持到底的勇气与承诺。”我认为这是她向所有人传达出的一条信息，尤其是在面对拒绝的时候。领导者不会屈从于失败，他们会努力克服它。别人看到问题的时候，他们却会看到希望。他们之所以坚持不懈地带领人们前进，是因为他们下定决心，要让他们想象的世界在未来某一天变成现实。（财富中文网）

    译者：刘进龙/汪皓

    审校：任文科

    MPW Insider is an online community where the biggest names in business and beyond answer timely career and leadership questions. Today’s answer for: How should every successful woman deal with rejection? is written by Alyse Nelson, CEO and co-founder of Vital Voices Global Partnership.

    Every leader I know has a story of a setback. Leaders are defined – not defeated – by setbacks. The truth is, it’s not rejection or failure that holds us back, it’s the way we choose to respond. And ultimately, it’s what we choose to do in a tough situation that enables us to realize our potential to succeed. A few years ago I heard Arianna Huffington say, “Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s a stepping stone tosuccess.”And I couldn’t agree more.

    For 18 years, I’ve worked with exceptional women leaders who have been able to achieve their goals because they refuse to give up. What matters most is not the act of failing, but how we pick ourselves up after we get knocked down — the lessons we take away. There are two things everyone should do when faced with failure: learn from it and keep going. True leaders are determined. They’re cause-driven. Their power is rooted in self-awareness. We have to be humble about our strengths and weaknesses, and then choose to move forward with clarity of purpose.

    I believe that most leaders are not born, they’re made from experience and opportunity. Failure is a key part of this. Failures strengthen our resolve and help us cultivate a deeply held conviction. You can’t be a leader without knowing why you’re leading – without a defined and unshakeable sense of purpose. Sometimes we realize this purpose only after being tested. When we fail, we gain perspective about where we’re going, how we’re going to get there, and why we began in the first place.

    In my own experience, the times I’ve been knocked down have given me invaluable insight –about my leadership, my driving force, and myself. Personal development is hard-fought and hard-won – but it’s worth it. Four years ago, I had the rare privilege of meeting with Burmese pro-democracy leader Aung San Suu Kyi in Rangoon. She had just been released from unjust house arrest that had lasted 20 years. It’s an experience that’s stayed with me, and I know I will always look back on those few hours as one of the most surreal and inspiring experiences of my life.

    Throughout a lifetime of leadership, Aung San Suu Kyi has never hesitated to stake her voice, her freedom or her safety to preserve an ideal. She has taken enormous risks, endured persecution and countless setbacks. But these don’t compare to the worth she sees in protecting values of equality, democracy, and justice. She chooses to see beyond the risk of failure because she is intently focused on her vision for Burma and lets nothing deter her sense of purpose or rob her conviction.

    She told me something that I’ve shared with so many of the women we work with. She said, “the difference between good intentions and great leadership is the courage and commitment to stay the course, no matter how difficult the path.” I think it’s a message for all of us, especially when we think about rejection. Leaders don’t give in to failure, they rise above it. They see promise where others see problems. They lead – relentlessly – because they’re determined to someday live in the world they imagine.