不光是Altaba——七个最糟糕的企业更名案例

前不久，雅虎宣布，将核心业务转让给威瑞森电信（Verizon Communications）后，剩余资产将纳入一家名为Altaba的控股公司——这个名字听起来更像是婴儿牙牙学语，而非一家曾经前途光明的互联网巨擘留下的东西。

这样的意见来自于手脚勤快的推特（Twitter）用户。消息公布后，他们迅速群起而攻之。Altaba将持有阿里巴巴15%的股份以及雅虎日本35.5%的股权。

一位推特用户嘲讽道：“去问问医生，叫Altaba合适吗。”

另一位用户写道：“‘Altaba’是拉丁文，意思是‘2008年我们应该接受微软450亿美元的收购报价’。”

“Altaba”看来是由“alternative”和“Alibaba”组合而来，看到雅虎给自己剩下的资产起了这样一个名字后，《财富》杂志决定回顾一下其他曾经更名改姓但未能得偿所愿的公司。

本文不会涉及那些效果欠佳的企业品牌重塑项目，那是另一个非常棘手的问题。

Tribune Publishing将名称缩减为tronc，2016年

不，这不是拼写错误。就在半年前，正在设法抵御甘尼特集团（Gannett）敌意收购的新闻出版机构Tribune Publishing决定更名为“tronc Inc.”，后者代表“tribune online content”。这次更名有点儿许下诺言的意思，承诺的内容包括跟上当今技术的脚步,以及开始在“内容变现引擎”中使用机器学习和人工智能技术。

谷歌将母公司命名为Alphabet，2015年

在林林总总的名称中，Alphabet是个相当无害的名字，因为其中没有拟声成分。但对一些批评者来说，给谷歌母公司起个新名字的决定似乎略显任性。还有人开玩笑说，对于一家当时市值超过3,000亿美元的科技公司来说，这个名字可谓天真烂漫。现在谷歌的市值已经超过5,600亿美元。

甘尼特将剥离后的数字媒体业务称为TEGNA，2015年

作为《今日美国》（USA Today）的出版方，甘尼特集团决定剥离数字媒体业务。通过重新排列自己名号中的一些字母，甘尼特给了后者一个新名称，还将其完全资本化。当时的集团CEO加西亚·莫托尔说，这个名字是“对甘尼特逾百年历史的总结。”许多推特用户都觉得无法从这个新名称中领略到百年老店的高贵气质。

Netflix将DVD邮寄业务更名为Qwikster，2011年

2011年9月，首席执行官里德·黑斯廷斯宣布Netflix将拆分为两家公司——一家从事DVD邮寄业务，另一家为流媒体视频服务商。前者更名为Qwikster，以体现其递送之迅速。然而，此举等于放弃了一个有十几年价值的品牌，拆分后的提价也很快惹怒了消费者。发布公告仅仅几个月后，黑斯廷斯就收回了这项决定。

从Blackwater到2009年的Xe Services，再到2011年的Academi

2009年，Blackwater对军工承包商来说已经变成了一个“有毒”的名字，原因是2007年该公司的5名员工被指与17名赤手空拳的伊拉克平民丧生有关。这迫使它更名为Xe Services，以便远离是非。2010年，一些个人投资者买下了这家公司，随后将其名称变更为Academi。时任CEO的泰德·赖特告诉《华尔街日报》（Wall Street Journal），他想让公司变得更加“无趣”。

菲利普-莫里斯为消除不健康形象更名为高特利，2003年

从前，烟草和癌症的关系还不广为人知，菲利普-莫里斯（Philip Morris）也是一个绝对可用的公司名称。然后就到了1994年，该公司高管知道尼古丁可致人上瘾以及香烟可能导致肺癌的事遭曝光，公众随即和大型烟草公司对立起来。到2003年，菲利普-莫里斯希望顾客了解到自己“不光是一家烟草公司”。它选择了高特利这个名字，并为之配上了马赛克一样的标识，和自己扎在烟草堆里的根没有任何瓜葛。 （财富中文网）

作者：Lucinda Shen

译者：Charlie

Recently, Yahoo announced that following the sale of its core business to Verizon Communications, the leftover assets would placed under a holding company termed "Altaba"—a name that sounded more like infantile babble than the remnants of a once-promising internet giant.

That's according to industrious Twitter users, who quickly swooped in following the announcement to take jabs at the company that will include Yahoo's 15% stake in Alibaba and its 35.5% stake in Yahoo Japan.

"Ask your Doctor If Altaba is right for you," one user quipped.

"'Altaba' is Latin for 'We should have taken Microsoft's $45 billion offer in 2008'," another wrote.

In light of Yahoo's decision to name its remaining holdings "Altaba,"—apparently a portmanteau of "alternative" and "Alibaba"—Fortune decided to revisit other companies that launched a new name—and fell short.

We won't be tackling corporate rebranding projects that fell flat. That's a whole different monster.

Tribune Publishing truncates its name to tronc in 2016

Yes, that is not a typo. Just half-a-year ago, newspaper chain Tribune Publishing decided to rename its self "tronc Inc.," which stands for "tribune online content" while it was trying to fend off a hostile takeover from Gannett. The rebranding was a kind of pledge of sorts, that Tribune would catch up with current technology and start using machine learning and artificial intelligence in its "content monetization engine."

Google goes under parent company named Alphabet in 2015

In the grand scheme of things, "Alphabet" is a fairly harmless moniker given its lack of onomatopoeia. But to some critics, the decision to use a new name for Google's umbrella company seemed a bit arbitrary. Others joked that the name was childlike for a tech company with a market cap that was, at the time, in excess of $300 billion. Now it's over $560 billion.

Gannett spins off its digital media business, calls it TEGNA in 2015

When the publisher of USA Today decided to spin off its digital media business, it made a new name for itself by rearranging a few letters in its name, and capitalizing the whole thing. Then-Gannett CEO Garcia Mortore said that the name was "a nod to the more than 100 year-old history of Gannett." Many Twitter users failed to find the dignity associated with a century-long heritage in the new name.

Netflix renames its DVD-by-mail service Qwikster in 2011

In September 2011, CEO Reed Hastings announced it would split into two separate companies: a DVD-by-mail service, and a streaming service. The former would be renamed "Qwikster" to reflect the company's speedy delivery. In doing so however, the company foresook more than a decade's worth of branding, and quickly enraged consumers with price increases associated with the split. Just months after the announcement, the CEO was forced to backpedal.

From Blackwater to Xe Services in 2009, then to Academi in 2011

By 2009, Blackwater's own name had become toxic to the military contractor. Five of its employees were indicted in 2007 in relation to the deaths of 17 unarmed Iraqi civilians—forcing the company to change its name to Xe Services in a bid to distance itself from the controversy. In 2010, the company was sold to a group of private investor, and it's name was later changed to Academi. Then-CEO Ted Wright told the Wall Street Journal he was trying to make the company more "boring."

Philip Morris tries to shed its unhealthy image by renaming itself Altria in 2003

Once upon a time, tobacco's links to cancer weren't well-known, and Philip Morris was a perfectly viable name for a company. Then 1994 happened, and the public turned against big tobacco amid revelations that the companies' executives were exposed to research that suggested nicotine was addictive and cigarettes could cause lung cancer. By 2003, Philip Morris wanted its consumers to know that it was "more than a tobacco company." It adopted the name Altria, and paired it with a mosaic logo that made no reference to its tobacco-laden roots.