你要“并购式婚姻”还是“创业式婚姻”？

在本期财富网站的 “250个字”书评专栏中，山姆•麦克纳尼与颇具影响力的自由主义作家查尔斯•默里坐谈，查尔斯在1984年出版的《节节败退》（Losing Ground）一书帮助前美国总统克林顿提出了福利改革模型，而他在1994年出版的《钟形曲线》（The Bell Curve）则因种族问题的言论在美国掀起轩然大波。

他最新的著作即将面世，而这次，默里不再挑起争议，而试图给人以建议。

默里的新书《坏脾气者的前进指南：有关走正道、勤思考、写清楚、过上好日子的行为准则》（The Curmudgeon's Guide to Getting Ahead: Dos and Don'ts of Right Behavior, Tough Thinking, Clear Writing, and Living a Good Life）在4月由兰登书屋（Random House）出版，这是一本对应届毕业生的指导手册。在此，山姆•麦克纳尼将与默里谈一谈如何才能有一副好文笔，与人为善与做好人之间的区别，以及比尔•默里电影给人的道德启发。

麦克纳尼：你在新书的开篇就给出了几个“如何在工作场所展示自己”的小建议，你最喜欢哪一个？

默里： 毫无疑问，我最喜欢第三条建议“把‘喜欢’从口语中删除”，那些把“喜欢”当口头禅的人简直会把我逼疯。第五条建议“适度使用强硬措辞”也是我的最爱，如果你想要强硬的措辞发挥最大的效果，就要先把这些说法记下来，然后在合适的场合使用，光靠把同一个词连续重复五遍是没什么用的。英语是一种美妙的语言，你要试着发挥出的最大效果。

你在书中用了很大的篇幅谈论如何做好思考和写作。你写道“写作的过程是想出更好创意的最有价值的工具”，那么你曾收到过的最宝贵的写作建议是什么？

重写，重写，再重写，这是我的亲身经验。我不知道其他作家的情况，但就我来说，写书的过程如同雕刻一般。我一遍遍地审读草稿，不断地删减冗句、增补细节，反复推敲每一句话。常常会整段删除，重头来过。

在你看来，推崇“不做评判主义”（nonjudgmentalism）有什么问题？

不愿进行判断的唯一原因就是刻意逃避思考。人类与众不同的地方就在于有着能够进行判断的认知能力，而“不做评判主义”是对这种能力的否认。你可以不赞成但容忍某些人的观点或行为，这是你的自由。 “不做评判主义”从道义上说是懦弱的表现形式。

你可以解释下“与人为善”与“做好人”之间的区别吗？

“与人为善”意味着是你的行为可以立即获得令人愉悦的结果，而“做好人”则意味着你的行为会对人类的福祉有所贡献。有时，“与人为善”与“做好人”某些时候是一样的，但却并不总是这样。

你在书中写道“选择‘创业式婚姻’而非‘并购式婚姻’”，这两种婚姻形式之间有什么区别？

在“并购式婚姻”中，男女双方在结婚时各自都有着稳定的职业，有时还有着不错的薪水。而在“创业式婚姻”中，双方都是处于刚刚起步的阶段。这两种婚姻形式各有利弊，但我认为，在“创业式婚姻”中，夫妻和谐的情形要更为普遍。夫妻二人在打拼的过程中更能创造特殊的情感链接。

你的许多潜在读者可能信奉无神论和不可知论。他们或许会遵循一些宗教传统，但却并不信教。他们为何应该“认真地对待宗教”？

在我看来，那些不相信主日学校的故事、也不愿意思考宗教意义的人，就不能用丰富多彩的、充满智慧及富有成效的方式去试图理解宇宙。我并不介意无神论者。但一个“自信的”无神论者在我看来是鲁莽无知的。

假设我现在二十多岁，进了名牌大学，我渴望在自身所在行业取得成功，除了你的这本新书之外我还应该读哪些书呢？

我还是单纯地认为，无论是在工作中还是在灵魂上，美德都是有回报的。因此，学习下《尼各马可伦理学》（Nichomachean Ethics）很有帮助，如果做不到，那就把《偷天情缘》（Groundhog Day）多看几遍吧。（财富中文网）

译者 唐昕昕

For this installment, 250 Words' Sam McNerney sits down with the influential and incendiary libertarian author

Charles Murray. Murray's 1984 book Losing Ground helped shape welfare reform under President Bill Clinton, and his 1994 release, The Bell Curve, ignited national outrage over its arguments about race.

His new book comes out on Tuesday. This time around, though, Murray isn't courting controversy. He just wants to help.

Murray's latest, The Curmudgeon's Guide to Getting Ahead: Dos and Don'ts of Right Behavior, Tough Thinking, Clear Writing, and Living a Good Life, is a vade mecum for the recent graduate. It was released by Random House on Tuesday. Here, Sam talks to Murray about how to write well, the difference between being nice and being good, and the Bill Murray movie that can help teach morality.

McNerney: You begin The Curmudgeon's Guide to Getting Ahead by outlining a few tips "on the presentation of self in the workplace." What are your favorites?

Murray: Without question, tip #3, "Excise the word 'like' from your spoken English." People who use "like" as a verbal tic drive me nuts. Tip #5, "On the proper use of strong language," is also a favorite. If you want the f-bomb to be a bomb, for example, you've got to hold it in reserve for when it's the mot juste. Repeating it five times in a row doesn't cut it. The English language is a thing of beauty. Tap into its power.

A portion of your book provides a number of suggestions for thinking and writing well. You write that "the process of writing is your most valuable single tool for developing better ideas." What is the most valuable writing advice you've ever received?

I learned it on my own: Rewrite, rewrite, rewrite. I don't know about other writers, but I don't so much write a book as sculpt it. I go through drafts endlessly, chipping away, adding detail, polishing a little with each pass. And frequently throwing out whole paragraphs and starting from scratch.

What's wrong with the celebration of "nonjudgmentalism"?

The only you way can avoid making judgments is if you deliberately refuse to think. That's a rejection of what makes human beings special: the cognitive capacity to make judgments.Tolerance of ideas and behaviors of which you do not approve, but which people should be free to hold and do, is good. Nonjudgmentalism regarding ideas and behaviors is a form of moral cowardice.

Will you explain the difference between being nice and being good?

Being nice means behaving in ways that have immediately pleasant consequences. Being good means behaving in ways that contribute to the welfare of your fellow human beings. Sometimes being nice and being good call for the same behaviors, but often they do not.

You write "be open to a startup marriage instead of a merger marriage." What's the difference between the two?

In a merger marriage, both partners are well established in their careers and usually have comfortable incomes when they tie the knot. In a startup, the bride and groom are both getting started. Each kind of marriage has its own advantages and strengths. I think symbiosis in a marriage is more common in startups. Making your way together from the beginning can create a special bond.

Many people reading your book will be either atheist or agnostic. They might participate in religious traditions, but they are not religious. Why should they "take religion seriously"?

People who decide that the Sunday school stories weren't true and don't give religion another thought are failing to take advantage of a rich, intellectually demanding, and -- in my view --productive way of trying to understand the universe. I don't mind people being atheists. Being aconfident atheist seems to me to be silly, unreflective, and ignorant.

Let's say I'm in my twenties, I attended a well-known college, and I aspire to become successful within my industry. Besides The Curmudgeon's Guide to Getting Ahead, what books should I read?

I'm so naïve that I think virtue is rewarded in the workplace as well as in one's soul. So study Aristotle's

Nichomachean Ethics. Or, failing that, watch Groundhog Day several times.