为照顾家庭，男性CEO开始辞职

    六月底，当《今日秀》（Today Show）主持人马特•劳尔与通用汽车（General Motors）CEO玛丽•巴拉坐在一起的时候，他向这家汽车公司的第一位女性领导人提出了下列问题：

    “你在不久前的一次采访中说到，你的孩子们说他们要让你对一项工作负起责任，那就是做一个好妈妈。鉴于你在通用汽车面临如此巨大的压力，你能否同时做好这两份工作？”

    巴拉彬彬有礼地回答了这个问题。她告诉劳尔，她有一支了不起的团队，有一个美满的家庭，还有一位全力支持她的丈夫。值得注意的是，她并没有把这个问题抛给劳尔，反问他是如何应对NBC（美国国家广播公司）苛刻的工作安排，同时还能做一个称职的父亲。

    男性高管几乎从未听到过这个问题。MongoDB公司刚刚离职的CEO马克斯•希雷森可以证实这一点。

    这位数据库公司的负责人对如何兼顾父亲和公司经营者这两个角色，进行了仔细斟酌，最终在周二决定辞职。

    希雷森在一篇博客中解释了他辞职的原因。他写道：“作为一名男性CEO，有人曾问过我开什么样的汽车，喜欢什么样的音乐，但从来没有人问我如何平衡父亲和CEO这两个角色。”

    女性依旧是“两全其美”争论的焦点——她们能否既在高层职位上取得成功，又能做好贤妻良母？如今，她们的男性同行们也开始问自己同样的问题。

    在希雷森的领导下，这家数据库公司已经发展到数十亿美元的规模。今年，希雷森的CEO商务出行，以及从位于加州帕洛阿尔托的家到公司位于纽约办公室之间的通勤距离，加起来接近300,000英里的飞行距离。

    而在路上耗费的大量时间，也是他和家人以及三个孩子分离的时间。

    “在出差的过程中，我错过了许多家庭乐趣，更重要的是，当我们家的宠物狗发生车祸的时候，或者当我儿子做急诊手术（意外的小手术，非常成功）的时候，我都没能陪在孩子们身边。”

    他表示，他不在家人身边的时候，是妻子分担了他的责任。这项任务并不轻松，因为作为一位医生兼斯坦福大学（Stanford University）教授，她同样面临巨大压力。

    希雷森写道：“朋友和同事经常问我妻子，她如何平衡自己的工作和母亲的责任。但从来没有人问过我这样的问题。”

    这样的问题一直困扰着女性，她们也开始公开谈论工作和家庭的价值。谢丽尔•桑德伯格鼓励女性“向前一步”（lean in）。全国性杂志的封面文章也深入探讨了如何在母亲和职业女性之间做出正确的选择，更不用说无数博客文章了。

    希雷森能够辞去CEO，只担任“正常的全职”副董事长，确实令人羡慕，而一位男性CEO能够提出女性CEO才可能提出的问题，则是在为高管创造跨越性别的公平环境方面，迈出了重要一步。

    “两全其美”的争论是时候超越性别界限了。正如希雷森最后写道，不论男性还是女性，都需要做同样一道算术题：

    “这样做是否会让我损失数千万美元的收入？或许吧。生活充满了选择。现在，我选择用更多时间来陪伴家人，我相信，与此同时，我依旧能够从事一份有意义、有回报的工作。”（财富中文网）

    译者：刘进龙/汪皓

    When Today Show host Matt Lauer sat down with General Motors’ CEO Mary Barra in late June, he asked the automaker’s first female leader:

    “You said in an interview not long ago that your kids said they’re going to hold you accountable for one job, and that is being a mom. Given the pressure at General Motors, can you do both well?”

    Barra graciously answered the question, telling Lauer that she has a great team, a wonderful family and a supportive husband. Notably, she didn’t turn that question back on Lauer to ask how he handles his demanding work schedule at NBC and still manages to be a good father.

    Male executives almost never hear that question. MongoDB’s now-former CEO Max Schireson can attest to that.

    The head of the database company decided to step down Tuesday after asking himself how he can balance the dual demands of fatherhood and running a company.

    “As a male CEO, I have been asked what kind of car I drive and what type of music I like, but never how I balance the demands of being both a dad and a CEO,” wrote Schireson in a blog post explaining why he decided to step down as the chief executive for MongoDB.

    Women are still the focus of the “having it all” debate and questions of whether or not they can be wildly successful at both a high-powered job and day-to-day parenting. Now their male counterparts are asking the same question of themselves.

    Schireson, who helped grow the database company into a billion-dollar business, is on pace to fly 300,000 miles this year between the normal CEO travel duties and commuting from his home in Palo Alto, Calif. to the company’s New York City office.

    All that time on the road adds up to many hours and days away from his family, including three kids.

    “During that travel, I have missed a lot of family fun, perhaps, more importantly, I was not with my kids when our puppy was hit by a car, or when my son had (minor and successful, and of course unexpected) emergency surgery.”

    He credits his wife for helping to pick up the slack when he was away. Not an easy task considering her high-pressure role as a doctor and Stanford professor.

    “Friends and colleagues often ask my wife how she balances her job and motherhood,” Schireson wrote. “Somehow, the same people don’t ask me.”

    Questions like these have gnawed at women, who openly debate the value of work and family. Sheryl Sandberg has encouraged women to “lean in.” Cover articles in national magazines have delved into the minutiae of making the right choice as a mom and a professional, not to mention the countless blog posts in response to both.

    While it’s enviable that Schireson can step down as CEO to simply work “normal full time” as vice chairman, the fact that a male CEO is asking the same questions that a female CEO might ask is an important step towards leveling the playing field for top executives, regardless of their gender.

    It’s time for the “having it all” debate to move beyond gender. The math is the same, as Schireson concludes, whether you’re male or female:

    “Will that cost me tens of millions of dollars someday? Maybe. Life is about choices. Right now, I choose to spend more time with my family and am confident that I can continue to have an meaningful and rewarding work life while doing so.”