假如穆斯克、贝佐斯等最成功的创业者上创业真人秀，下场会是这样的

    马库斯•戈德门（高盛创始人）

    各位评委好。我叫马库斯•戈德门，这是我女婿塞缪尔•萨克斯。我们在华尔街开了一家投资银行，服务于大型企业、国家元首甚至皇室，同时帮助人们以钱生钱。

    我们相信，只要有少量启动资金，我们很快就将称霸世界。

    马克•库班：我很感兴趣，但华尔街不是有好多家投资银行吗？你为何确定你们的投行能生存下来并茁壮成长？

    这个问题问得好，马克，我们很高兴你提出这个问题。我们只招最优秀、最顶尖的人才。毕业于顶尖学府、最胸怀大志、聪明果决的银行家、分析师和交易员。他们将达成重要交易，并给公司带来海量现金。对于其中最必不可少的人物，我们将让他们当上合伙人，并开出天价薪酬来留住他们。

    罗伯特•赫贾维奇：这听起来倒是不错，但是…….

    我还没讲到最精彩的部分呢。未来几十年里，他们当中的许多人将离开我们公司，在美联储、美国财政部担任要职，甚至成为美国总统以及欧洲、亚洲、拉丁美洲各国政府的顾问。我们将拥有由政府要员和大银行家组成的前所未见的人脉网。

    我们将同时服务于每笔交易的买方和卖方，不论结果如何，我们都稳赔不赚。总之，我们将参与全世界所有涉及到钱的重大金融和经济决策。

    罗伯特•赫贾维奇：我不投。你这个项目完全没戏。（财富中文网）

    译者：Hunter

    审稿：李翔

    Marcus Goldman

    Hello Sharks. My name is Marcus Goldman and this is my son-in-law, Samuel Sachs. We’ve launched an investment bank on Wall Street that will cater to large corporations, heads of state, and even royalty as we help people turn their piles of money into even more money.

    We’re convinced that with a small amount of startup capital, we’ll be on our way toward world domination in no time.

    Mark Cuban: I’m intrigued, but aren’t there lots of other investment banks on Wall Street? How can you be sure that yours will survive and thrive?

    That’s a great question, Mark, and we’re glad you asked it. We’re only going to hire the very best and brightest. The smartest, most driven and determined bankers, analysts, and traders coming out of the top institutions of learning. They’ll close major deals and bring in windfalls of cash for the firm. We’ll make the most indispensable among them partners and pay incredible salaries to keep them.

    Robert Herjavec: That sounds good on paper, but...

    You didn’t hear the best part. Many of them will leave the firm over the coming decades and become instrumental members of the Federal Reserve, the Treasury Department, and even end up advising presidents in the White House as well as governments in Europe, Asia, and Latin America. We’ll have a network of influential government officials and bankers the likes of which the world has never seen.

    We’ll serve counterparties on both sides of every transaction and have an angle that allows us to win regardless of any potential outcome. In short, we’ll be in the room for every major financial and economic decision undertaken anywhere there is money on the line.

    Robert Herjavec: I’m out. It’ll never work.