马特森建议：“会面的时候，可以告诉对方，你并不是总有空马上回复他或她的信息。你的上司或许根本没指望你会马上回复。所以，不要认为必须立即回复，而是要弄清他真正想要的东西。”总有一天，你会收到惊喜。即便没有惊喜，拒绝在他每次发信息的时候都进行回复，你便可以坚定而又不失礼貌地确定了上司一直缺乏的界限。

    马上就这么做，不要再为此而大动肝火。马特森补充道：“许多人都在默默忍受，然后有一天突然爆发。但如果你能就这些相对次要的事情进行冷静的、有策略的谈话，便能在你与上司之间建立信任基础，更有利于你以后解决真正棘手的问题。”

    另外一个问题：你上司所犯的那些损失资金、损害信誉的错误。马特森问道：“他知道自己犯错了吗？首先要对他进行‘无罪推定’，假设他并不知道问题所在。”

    你的任务（如果你愿意接受的话）是指出问题所在，但不要专门批评任何人。马特森说：“从部门或团队的角度来描述这些错误，同时询问自己能做些什么来帮助避免出现更多错误。不要指责上司，而是要多讨论一下它对于整个团队的影响。当然，要表达一下对上司信誉的担忧，作为领导者，如果持续犯错误必将影响他的声誉。同时主动提出帮助制定一些可行的解决方案。”

    就算讨论没有任何效果，至少你已经尽力了。但也有可能，你的老板认识到问题所在，还把你当成了他潜在的“救命恩人”—— 这对你的职业发展非常有益。马特森表示：“如果你真的把与老板和谐相处作为首要任务，同时帮他在高层面前保全了面子，在18个月后，你或许会选择继续留在这里，谁知道呢？”这值得一试。

反馈：你是否遇到过难相处的或不合格的上司？你是如何应对的？欢迎评论。（财富中文网）

    译者：刘进龙/汪皓

    "When you do meet, mention that you aren't always available to reply right away," Mattson suggests. "Your boss may not even expect you to. Rather than assuming that an immediate answer is required, clarify what it is he actually wants." There's always a chance you'll be pleasantly surprised. Even if not, by declining to answer every time he pings you, you'll have politely but firmly established the boundaries your boss seems to lack.

    Do this now, before you get any more ticked off about it, Mattson adds: "So many people suffer in silence for too long and then blow their stack. But if you have these calm, tactful conversations about relatively minor things, it builds a foundation of trust for when you have to tackle the really tough issues."

    One such issue, clearly: Those costly and reputation-tarnishing errors your boss has been making. "Does he know he's making these mistakes?" Mattson wonders. "Start by giving him the benefit of the doubt and assuming he's unaware of the problem."

    Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to point out what's going on without blaming anyone in particular. "Describe the errors in terms of the department or the team, and ask whether there's anything you can do to help prevent any more mistakes," Mattson says. "Instead of accusing the boss, make it more about the effect on the whole group. Above all, express concern for his reputation, as the leader, if the errors continue, and offer to help develop

    If this discussion leads nowhere, well, you did what you could. It's possible, though, that your boss knows things aren't going well and will react as if you had thrown him a much-needed life preserver -- which could be very nice for your own career, too. "If you really make it a priority to build a good rapport with this boss, and help him save face with higher-ups, who knows, you might even decide to stay beyond the next 18 months," Mattson says. It's worth a try.

Talkback: Have you ever had a difficult or incompetent boss? How did you deal with him or her? Leave a comment below.