与客户搞好关系的5大要点：如何把趾高气昂的“上帝”变成合作伙伴？

    了解这些信息后，就可以寻找“共同点”，再与客户分享。如果没有，也请不要伪造共同点。谎言终究会被识破。要建立共同点，真实才是关键。共同点的建立可以在私人会面时完成，例如午餐、晚餐，甚至一杯咖啡的时间。这并不意味着你需要带着客户出去喝到酩酊大醉！事实上，这些场合反倒很难与客户分享经历。然而，通过一个真诚的请求表达出你想了解他们的意愿，就能明确传达出这样的信号：你在乎他们，你想融入他们、了解他们。分享你的个人经历能够转变他们看待你的方式。

    学会将客户信息整理出一份资料，并在每次会面或致电前回顾这些内容。带着对客户的了解与之对话，这样他们每次都能感受到，你并没有单纯地将他们视作交易对象，而且你们还拥有共通之处。这就是建立“默契关系”的秘诀，在默契的状态下，两个人很容易达到和谐之境。建立的默契越多，对方变成“上帝”的机会就越小。

    “人们愿意和自己喜欢的人做生意，而且往往也喜欢那些与自己相似的人”

    ——安东尼•罗宾

    5. 用心聆听，而不仅仅是给个耳朵。很多人都不会倾听。为什么？因为他们都在忙着思考要说什么，或准备进行辩解，或回击，或“证明自己的论点正确”。这是非常悲哀的，同时也几乎是所有问题的症结所在。你可以把握和客户在一起的一切机会，通过学会全心“聆听”客户的要求，改变你的倾听能力。

    ·注意他们的面部表情

    ·聆听他们的语调

    ·聆听他们的呼吸频率

    ·聆听情感

    ·聆听更深层次的问题和关注点

    ·聆听对获取帮助的请求

    ·通过聆听寻找做出贡献的可能性

    这种聆听方式需要练习，而且不管是谁，只要愿意放下自我并且敞开心扉去体会他人的全部，都很容易习得。练习的次数越多，就越容易做到。

    事实上，对他人产生影响力的最有力方式是聆听，而不是述说。同时，在你述说时，将聆听到的内容反映到你的述说当中。

    As you learn these things, look for the “common ground” and share it with them. Don’t fake it or pretend you have things in common if you don’t. You will be found out. To establish Common Ground, authenticity is key. This can be done during personal meeting time such as lunches, dinners or even a cup of coffee. It doesn’t mean you have to take them out and drink with them until you pass out! In fact, on those occasions, very little is often shared. But a sincere request to learn more about your customer sends a clear signal: you care, you are involved, you want to know them as people. Sharing a personal story about yourself literally has the ability to transform how they see you.

    As you learn keep a file on them and review it before each meeting or phone call. Bring your understanding of them into conversations, each time reminding them you are a person that sees them as more than a transaction and that you have things in common with them. This is the secret of building “Rapport”--- a state where two people easily get into harmony. The more rapport you build, the less people act like “Lords.”

    “People like to do business with people they like. And, they like people who are like them.” Anthony Robbins

    5. Listen with Your Heart, Not Just Your Mind.Most people simply don’t listen. Why? Because they are too busy planning what they want to say, or planning to defend or hit back or ‘score a point.’ That is very sad and is actually the cause of almost all the trouble there is. You can transform your listening by learning to be fully “present” with your customers whenever you are together.

     Listen to their facial expression

     Listen to the tone of their voice

     Listen to the rate of their breathing

     Listen for emotions

     Listen for the deeper issues and concerns

     Listen for requests for help

     Listen for the possibilities to make a contribution

    To listen in this way takes practice, and, it can be easily learned by anyone who is willing to put their own ego aside and just open themselves to experiencing the totality of the other person.The more you practice, the easier it gets.

    Listening is the most powerful way to gain influence with others, not talking. And, when you speak, let your speaking reflect what showed up in your listening.