专业人士为什么说一套做一套

    60岁的彼得•施维泽是纽约市人道犹太教城市教会（The City Congregation for Humanistic Judaism）的教士。他在大学的时候对犹太研究产生了兴趣，于是决定在改革运动中成为一名犹太教教士，尽管他从未考虑过自己对上帝的信仰。但后来，作为一名主持葬礼的年轻教士，经常要背诵第23章圣歌，他发现自己再也忍受不了让哀悼者们从上帝那里寻找慰藉。因为他认为在那样的时刻，这些根本不能给人们带来慰藉。

    施维泽回忆道：“我们心中有痛苦。我们需要哀悼。我们现在很难受。这是一场悲剧。这样的生活太虚伪，我已经不是我自己了。于是我说：‘我必须诚实；我不能再干这种事了。’我必须找到一条新的道路。”

    他在一家出版社工作了一段时间，后来又成为一名社会工作者，终于他有机会接触到人道犹太教。这个教派接受各种不同的信仰，重视诚实。于是他在现在的这个教会自愿担任教士，随着教会的规模越来越大，他也得到了一份带薪的职位。施维泽表示，由于自己曾经的经历，他感觉对于那些质疑自己信仰的会众来说，他是一位更富有同情心、更有效的教士。

    他说：“我是一位无神论者，这一点我不想隐瞒。重要的并不是我们不信什么，而是我们相信什么……我相信人类有面对各种事情的能力。我相信人类的适应能力。我相信幽默、勇气、思考。我相信社区的力量。这些非常强大，甚至超越了许多东西。”    

    而对于卡洛斯•格林，皮鞋里潮湿的硬纸板预示着他的生活跌入了低谷，于是他和妻子做出了重大改变，来减少开支，偿还债务，避免申请破产。他们卖掉了带精装修地下室、共有五间卧室的梦幻家园，搬到一栋很小的两居室内。两个儿子共用一个房间，爱犬随便找地方睡。他们节衣缩食，用了三年时间，终于还清了信用卡的债务。格林夫妇发誓，再也不要重蹈覆辙。他们再次搬家的时候，买了一栋在自己承受范围之内的房子。而且，他开始参加公司提供的免费研讨会和培训机会，提高自己的预算与个人理财能力。

    十多年后，格林表示，他感觉当时的经历对他的金融服务职业提供了帮助。他说：“我把客户当作真正的人来看待。对于他们的经历，我更能感同身受。这让我有更好的视角来提出水平更高的问题，确保客户为退休生活制定可靠的储蓄规划。”

    实际上，达特纳表示，在评估一个言行不一的职业人士时，应该问一个关键的问题，即他是偶尔出现了一两次疏忽，还是他始终在违反自己倡导其他人坚持的规则——而且没有任何改进的迹象。如果是后者，这样的人非常虚伪，自然应该敬而远之。但如果是前者，他们或许有更多的见解和智慧。毕竟，如果一名饮食专家从来没有为坚持一个饮食计划而努力过，你会相信他的减肥建议吗？

    达特纳说：“我宁愿相信亲自经历过同样问题的人；这会让他们更加可信。”（财富中文网）

    译者：刘进龙/汪皓  

    Peter Schweitzer, 60, rabbi of The City Congregation for Humanistic Judaism in New York City, grew interested in Judaic studies in college and decided to become a rabbi in the Reform movement, despite the fact that he had never really given his beliefs in God much consideration. But later, as a young rabbi officiating at funerals, where the 23rd Psalm was standard fare, he found he could no longer bear to tell mourners to find comfort in a God that was anything but caring in those moments.

    "There is pain. We do need to moan. We are upset right now. This is a tragedy," Schweitzer recalls. "It was getting too hypocritical for me to be me. I said, 'I have to be honest; I can't do this any more.' I have to find a new path."

    He worked in publishing for a while and became a social worker before finding his way to Humanistic Judaism, in which many different beliefs are accepted and a premium is put on honesty. He volunteered as a rabbi in his current congregation before it grew large enough to offer him a paid position. Schweitzer says he feels he's a more compassionate and effective rabbi to members of his congregation who question their beliefs because of the path he took.

    "I'm clearly an atheist. I don't wave it around," he says. "It's not what we don't believe, it's what we do believe that matters ... I believe in human ability to face things. I believe in resilience. I believe in humor, courage, thinking. I believe in the strength of community. It's very, very powerful and it transcends lots of things." 

    As for Carlos Greene, after hitting bottom with soggy cardboard in his shoes, he and his wife overhauled their lives to reduce expenses, pay down their debt, and avoid filing for bankruptcy. They sold their five-bedroom dream home with a finished basement and moved into a small two-bedroom townhouse where their two sons shared a room and the dog slept wherever she could. It took nearly three years of scrimping and saving to pay down the credit cards, and both Greenes vowed never to fall back into that hole. The next time they moved, they spent less on a house than they could afford. And he began taking the free seminars and educational opportunities that his firm provided, to improve his budgeting and personal finance skills.

    More than a decade later, Greene says he feels that the experience has helped him in his work as a financial services professional. "I see our clients and our customers as real people. I have a lot more compassion for where they are," he says. "It gives me greater perspective on asking the next-level questions to make sure they're in a good space to truly be able to save for retirement."

    Indeed, Dattner says that when evaluating a professional who doesn't practice what he preaches, the key question is to ask whether he slips up once or twice, or if he perennially violates the rules he says you must follow -- with no sign of reforming. The latter individual is a hypocrite who should be avoided, but the former might actually have more insight and wisdom to offer. After all, would you want a dietician telling you how to lose weight if that person had never struggled to stick to an eating plan?

    "I'd rather have somebody who has the issue themselves; that makes them much more credible," Dattner says.