按照弗雷德伯格的理解，任何被称作“专横”（或“粗鲁”）的人都应该认真搞清别人为什么这么想。她建议这些人带上具体的事例，也就是那些因为管理风格惹毛别人的例子，去寻求诚实的反馈——无论是通过正式的全面评估，还是非正式地问问周围的人。

    她说，“大多数同事都会很高兴地告诉你”可以在哪里做出变化和改进。“不要辩解。真正听听他们说了些什么。”然后试着少做些显得“专横”（或者以权压人）的事情。

    她补充道，她也碰到过一些罕见的情况，无论女性做了什么，怎么做，在行使权力时都会遭到怨恨。这时你可能应该换一家公司，比如那些有更多女性身居高位的公司。她说：“这种情况表示你与那家公司的文化格格不入。但是通常情况下，如果某家单位的人不满意你跟他们交流的方式，无论你去别的哪家公司，人们对你的反应其实都会一个样。”如果是这样，简单地忽视同事对你的“强势”评价可能是最冒险的解决方法。

    反馈：如果你是一名女性经理人，是否被人说过“强势”？如果你是男性呢？（如果你回应了的话）你是如何回应的？欢迎在下方留言。（财富中文网）

    译者：严匡正

    By her lights, anyone who is called "bossy" (or "abrasive") would be smart to take a hard look at why others think that. Friedberg recommends going after honest feedback -- either via a formal 360-degree evaluation or, more informally, just by asking around -- with examples of particular instances where one's management style rubbed people the wrong way.

    "Most of your coworkers are only too happy to tell you" where you could change or improve, she notes. "Just don't be defensive. Really listen to what they're telling you." Then try to do less of whatever it is that comes across as "bossy" (or bullying).

    In rare instances, she adds, she has met women whose authority is resented no matter what they do or how they do it, at which point it may well be time to move to a different company, perhaps one with more women in high places. "It could be a bad cultural fit," she says. "But usually, if people in one organization object to the way you're communicating with them, you'll get the same reaction wherever you go." If that's the case, then simply ignoring being called "bossy," as your officemates say they do, could be the riskiest way to deal with it.

    Talkback: Have you ever been called "bossy" if you're a female manager, or the male equivalent if you're a man? How did you respond (if you did)? Leave a comment below.